Paul Thandi is a professional speaker, writer, life coach and digital media professional. Under his umbrella platform,
Mindshift.co.ke, the 29 year old father of two explores the human journey using various tools in an effort to help people find and better understand the 'self'.
Paul speaks to Damaris Agweyu about his quest to help people unlock their highest potential through his life coaching sessions.
Is a life coach like a therapist?No. A therapist tends to focus on the past and try to find where certain problems began; a life coach starts from where you are and works with you to find the way forward. Having a life coach is like having a life mentor, someone who helps you plan, execute and most importantly gain the clarity on your life and the vision you have for it.
So you motivate people to achieve their goals?There is a part of motivation in life coaching but it's motivation after I have given you a formula. You know with most motivation, it's exciting in the moment but when you wake up the next morning, you are back to your old self. With life coaching, you get the motivation and are given a formula to apply in your day to day; it's not a solution for everything but it's a start and it's a journey.
How would a session with you play out?The first session would be about getting your current status in your life: Where are you? What do want in life? Why are you where you are? People are different so we might get into some history to understand the context of your situation- If we find that there are deep seated issues that need to be dealt with, I would refer you to a therapist. Once we have established the status, we work on a road map for the way forward. We do this by looking at the unique raw materials that you have and fuse them to execute on the vision.
And this isn't something one can figure out on their own? A life coach is needed?It starts with knowing who you are; you'd be surprised by how many people don't know who they are. You ask people to define themselves and they tell you what they do: I am a nurse, a teacher, a photographer, writer- Ok those are things you do but who are you? What drives you, what makes you different from others? I often ask people to draw a 'T' table and dedicate one side to their ex and one side to themselves; I then ask them to state things they know about their ex on the first side- what they like, what drives them, what makes them happy and so on- on average people will have 20 to 25 points about their ex's character. Then on the second side, I ask for the same kind of information but themselves - most people go blank. So this is someone who has, all their life, been told to follow a certain path without question, yet that's not who they are. Can such a person really be happy? We may think all these 'accepted' careers are the be all and end all but can you show me a doctor who earns more money than Sauti Sol? And what did these guys do? They just took a passion and worked on it. So that means the same bills you are struggling to pay every month can be paid from a point of following your passion. Now that is life coaching. We are able to sit down and find out the 'I', who am I?
How many sessions would one typically need to answer this question?It depends on the person. Typically, the first 3 sessions will generate results. We do, however, need time to create a roadmap so we could meet weekly, bi-monthly or monthly to do this. Life coaching does not have an end. The point is to find and work on a trajectory for your life.
Why do you think it's so hard for people to answer the 'who am I' question?Because people define themselves by the conclusions that others have made about them. Within the first one hour of your life you're given a name, a home and a religion and most people spend the rest of their lives defending that.
I take it, you know who you are?Yes, but when I started this journey, I honestly didn't...
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