Motherhood in Kenya and Why We Should Look Out For Each Other
Mums are often if not always trying to pursue and move beyond beings mums. Whether working mums or stay at home mums they had/have goals before motherhood. In Kenya, there are a lot of expectations on mums. Maintaining a home, contributing towards the family’s upkeep, entertaining family and friends while rearing children and keeping up with career goals are some of the expectations from women.
In this regard, it can be hard to keep their personal identities as they immerse themselves at the center of selflessness. Whichever way a mum chooses to ease her workload or parent, support her.
Mum Guilt and Societal Shaming
At any given time, every mum gets feelings of not being good enough, mum enough or doing enough as a parent. This guilt will arise from the clash between your personal identity or career with motherhood. In other circumstances, the nature of parenting will bring societal shaming on you.
Societal shaming in Kenya is especially felt more by stay at home mothers and at times working mums with single mums not escaping it too. Supporting mums irregardless of the nature of their parenting and without pitting mums against each other is necessary in order to create a safe space for them.
Give Each Other a Break
Whether you are a stay at home mum, a working mum, married mum or a single mum; being a mum is enough as it is without adding other labels. Neither label has less roles or easier time and no one is more mummy than the next. Every mum strives to be the best mum she can be.
The dynamics may be different but the challenges are more or less the same. It’s important to understand the divisive roles these labels play when we allow them to.
Support every mum’s efforts to be a better mum or more present in the life of her children.
Provide Safe Spaces for Each Other
You are not the first person to go through any mum problem. Someone else did and came out strong. In this light mothers in Kenya should speak out in safe spaces provided for them; in order to encourage new mums, young mums and mums in general. Having conversations with like minded people will nourish your soul and bring solutions to problems.
Speak out on tough issues mothers face. Whether teen mums, single mums, mums in abusive marriages and relationships or divorced mums. In our quest to bring up healthy children, we must provide safe spaces for them and us to thrive.
There are a lot of diverse groups in Kenya tackling many of the challenges that mums go through and offering support based on these challenges. Some of these groups have been created by mums based on their experiences and the need to bring change. Join any that can meet your need or tell a mum whose life can be impacted by such a group.
Be Each Other’s Cheerleader! Support Work by Fellow Mums
Mums in Kenya are very hardworking in terms of creating safe havens for their families, juggling career and parenting and even heading companies if not creating their own company. In this light, womens should toot each other’s horns as they know what it took in terms of sacrifice and hard work to achieve those milestones.
Support fellow women, share their work and share resources to better equip women in anywomen forum or platform you may be in.